13 Dec 2009

The Sacrament of Marriage

Mathew19:5 “A man shall leave his father & mother & be joined to his wife, & the two shall become one flesh.” Therefore, marriage is a union of two, (Male and Female) who become one in flesh. It is The Holy Order (Sacrament) in Christian life. God is the inventor & mastermind behind it—and His creation is worth far more to Him than it is to us. This beautiful expression of love was created out of His own heart, as a gift to be experienced between a husband and wife. It is, only in the marriage that this manifestation of intimacy can be fully enjoyed in the depth for which it was created. Hebrews 13:4, “Marriage is honorable among all, & the bed undefiled; but fornicators & adulterers God will judge”. The more beautiful & unique something (like marriage) is, the more power it holds over our lives, either for good or bad influence. That is why it so easy for the devil to corrupt the most precious of God's gifts. When we become more in love with the gifts than the One who endowed them, the things that were designed to bless us begin to destroy us instead. Yes, God cares about how we select a partner as well our marriage. He does not want us to abuse ourselves in any way.

Q. What is the purpose of marriage?

A. The purpose of marriage is to replenish the Earth & keep the race going. Gen.1:28, “God blessed them & said to them ‘be fruitful & increase in number, fill the Earth & subdue (bring under control) it (earth).’” Here subdue has another meaning, “defeat it” that is defeat Satan's plans.

Q. Is there marriage in Heaven? Mt.22:28, “Now then, at the resurrection, whose wife will she be of the seven, since all of them were married to her?”

A. Resurrected souls & angels do not die & do not need to marry to keep there kind in existence. God did not say that angels were sexless or that they could not marry & have offspring's of women. The fallen angels (Satan's angels) did in-fact marry the daughters of men to produce races of giants. This is clear from Gen.6:1-4, “1When man began to increase in number on the Earth & daughters were born to them, 2the sons of God saw that the daughters of man were beautiful, & they married any of them they choose. 3Then the Lord said’ “My Spirit will not contend with man forever, for he is mortal; his days will be a 120 years.” 4The giants were on the Earth in those days & afterward - when the sons of God went to daughters of men & had children by them. They were the heroes of old, men of renown.” These giants were a result of union with wicked men (fallen angels). This proves that the fallen angels are capable of many human activities. Whereas resurrected angels, men & women do not die thus, no marriage in heaven, Mt.22:29-32.

It is Gods will for people to have a mate if they desire one. In the beginning when God created Adam, & Himself said this: "... It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him" (Gen.2:18). The Lord wants to bring a mate to those who will ask Him and have the patience to wait for His choice. However, some settle for Satan's provision instead of asking God for the patience to wait for the one whom He would send. If they would look to Jesus and seek to please Him, rather than being concerned about a mate, soon they would find the right one crossing their path. Looking for a man or woman to just keep them from being lonely, just to fill their needs, or to be a father or mother to their children should not be the only reasons for desiring a mate. They also need to be concerned about what kind of husband or wife they would be for a mate, at the same time what type of mate they are looking for. Single people should ask the Lord to fill them with His love and peace.


Being single is an important time to prepare for marriage. It can also be a time to experience a closer communion with God. As we seek God to cleanse us of the world and help us become the kind of wife or husband that would bless someone, we will soon find that we are not lonely. First, the Lord would begin using us to bless others; then we will find we are content in Him. Eventually, in God's plan and timing, He will bless us with a wonderful mate so that both lives can be a witness for Him. If a marriage cannot glorify the Lord, then it would be better to remain alone. Therefore, being single is better than to marry a person, who does not feel the same about our Living God as we do.

Marriage is a major choice we make in our lives, & we should never enter into it without much prayer. To rush into a marriage can be disastrous. If we allow the emotional or soul realm to dominate our lives, we become more susceptible to the enemy leading us astray through someone. This area of the flesh should be brought under the Lord's subjection so that Satan does not get the advantage and consequently destroy our lives and ministries. Here many have failed the Lord for they chose a man or woman over the Lord.

We find this true throughout the Bible, too. Solomon's heathen wives led him into idolatry. Samson lost his eyes because of a woman, Delilah. David committed murder because of passion for Bathsheba.

Man's emotions are not a reliable gauge upon which to establish a marriage relationship. We must know in the Spirit that it is God's will. It is much better to marry for character than for emotion. Emotions fluctuate; character does not. Satan can give us emotions or feelings of love for someone of his choice. (If he did not have this in his power, he could not split up marriages.) One of his favorite techniques is to suddenly take away the feelings once we had for our mate & give feelings for someone else. When he has successfully convinced us that our mate no longer loves us, he then leads them to divorce, whispering, "You are living a lie." After he has destroyed the marriage, he then leads one to marry again by stirring their emotions for another. Often after their next marriage, something similar happens. "Falling" in love is Satan's way. The very expression of these words should tell us something. A Christian should not blindly "fall" into any trap. Love is bigger than simply falling for someone. Certainly, the Lord gives us a wonderful emotional feeling for the one we are to marry. However, this "feeling" without God's direction can be disastrous as Satan can tamper with our emotions and feelings too.


Marriage, in a Christian's life, should be based on a decision directed by the Holy Spirit. A Christian's love for another is a commitment. Of course, the Lord will supply the emotions for the mate He sends, but that should not be the criterion for making the decision to marry. The Lord should be sought, and whatever He speaks to us, we should do. He knows the future and what is best for us. If we trust Him, He will not fail us in this or any other important area. Women or men who allow emotions to rule them will never be victorious Christians. Emotions should, always follow never lead.


During Old and New Testament times, fathers and mothers choose the mates for their children. God's people were very careful to choose those who were "believers." We find this practice still prevalent (continuing) in India and other Eastern cultures. The parents being, older & more prudent made wiser decisions than the children in this area. Therefore, parents are requested not to allow their children to choose a mate on their own. Parents are the unseen God, & if they allow their children to choose a partner of their choice means headship of children in the family, similarly parents headship above God.


Those who are single are cautioned in God's Word to seek a mate who is a believer. It also cautioned against marriages that are built on unsound base like a chance of getting a foreign job, dowry or wealth, family status, etc for it will not stand the test of time. Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness & wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? (2 Corinthians 6:14).” Many precious people suffer because they are living with unsaved mates (non-Christians). Some did not have Christ when they made their marriage decision, but they have since found the Lord. They will have God's grace and love to win their mates for Jesus. The Lord always strives to bring the lost mate to Himself through the partner who knows Him. Mighty miracles of deliverance and salvation have occurred when people have endured suffering in order to bring their mates to the Lord. Therefore, the main criterion for a marriage union should not be either the above or ‘beauty’. St. Peter in the book of 1Pet. 3:3-4 say’s 3Do not let your adornment be merely outward-arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel. 4Rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle & quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.” It should be built on faith & love.

The Lord wants to bless marriage unions and see His plans fulfilled in both mates' lives. What a glorious plan He had from the beginning for both male and female. We can trust Him in this important decision. If we totally commit to do His will, we will never be disappointed in the one He sends into our lives.

A marriage should portray the relationship between Christ & the Church. As they are glued together so should a husband & wife, Mt.19:5, Mk.10:7, Acts 5:36

4 Commands to wives (Ephesians 5)

  1. Submit to husbands as to Christ (v 22-33)

  2. Recognise headship of husbands (v23)

  3. Be subject to husbands (v24)

  4. Give respect to husbands (v33)


6 commands to husbands (Ephesians 5:23-33)

  1. Be head of wife as Christ is head of the Church (v23,25)

  2. Love wives as Christ loves the Church (v25)

  3. Loves wives as you love your own bodies (v28,33)

  4. Nourish (care for, bring up, protect) (v29; 6:4; Rev.12:6)

  5. Cherish (v29)

  6. Be joined as one flesh (v30-31)


No comments:

Post a Comment